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Lisa Daily, Dream Girl and author of
Stop Getting Dumped!
All you need to know to make men fall madly in love with you and marry 'The One' in 3 years or less.
"This chick really knows what she's talking about!" --Howard Stern
As seen on Sally, The Other Half and Howard Stern
Available at http://www.stopgettingdumped.com
and bookstores everywhere.
Is it Romantic Armageddon or Uncomfortable Shoes?
13 Warning
Signs You're About To Get Dumped!
By Lisa Daily
Want to know if your relationship is about to hit the skids?
Looking for tell-tale signs that your love will last through next week?
Well, look no further. Below you'll find the "Unlucky 13" -13 warning signs you're
about to get dumped.
We surveyed a variety of experts to find the most common warning signs a
person is about to get dumped --including psychologists, body language
experts, graphologists, private investigators and a divorce attorney. And here's
what we found:
1. Is it romantic Armageddon, or uncomfortable shoes?
Where the toes point, the heart follows. According to body language expert
Patti Wood, MA, CSP, you should, "look at your sweetie's feet when you are out
with other people." She says, "if they are pointed at you, great." If they're
pointed at someone else, your partner may be looking to walk.
2. You're starting to feel like a telemarketer.
Is your sweetie anxious to end phone conversations right away? A person who
knows she's going to end the relationship with you, but hasn't done so yet will
be itching to get off the phone with you. If she is talking to you, but not adding
anything to the conversation it's sign she is heading towards the finish line.
She's probably just pacing herself.
3. He's no longer interested in sex, or worse, he has a new bag of tricks
and a trapeze with the tags still on it.
A dramatic change in sexual behavior can mean two things:
a) He wants to avoid any situation where he might have to express emotion or
attachment to you, or
b) He's getting it somewhere else.
4. He avoids talking about the future.
We're not just talking the general, garden-variety aversion that men have to
discussing relationships. We're talking about a man who avoids having one of
those "we have to talk" talks like it's a shot of the Plague. As for the future,
when next Thursday seems like too much of a commitment, it could be because
he's trying to extricate himself by Wednesday night.
5. He says, "I need some space" or "I think we should see other people."
According to psychologist Jesse Rabinowitz, Ph.D, people don't usually want to
hurt someone else, so they use "exit strategies." By telling you he wants to see
other people, he's not technically breaking up with you (so no big crying scene
to endure) but he's given himself a way out. Of course, the second he gets a
little distance, he's going to make a run for it.
6. If she's looking left, something's not right.
According to Bill Raduenz, private investigator, a person who looks up into the
air and to the left when she speaks to you is "not being truthful." The look left
is an indication we're using the "creative" side of our brains and a good indicator
she's telling you a whopper.
7. He gives you that little pat on the back.
Watch out for this one. A person who gives you a hug while patting you on the
back is indicating that they are uneasy. According to Raduenz, the "hand pat"
on the back indicates someone is uncomfortable with what they're doing. The
bigger the pat, the more discomfort they feel.
There's more. Another important sign that things may not be going well is the
amount of contact during a hug. Full frontal contact is good. The one-shoulder
hug, or pulling away in other areas could be a sign the person is "distancing" in
the relationship. If it's a new relationship, the other person may not be quite
ready for that level of physical contact. If it's an established relationship, it
could be a sign the person is pulling away, or getting ready to break off the
relationship.
8. You don't like what you see in the mirror.
People mirror each other's body language when they are in love with similar
gestures, voice volume, etc. If you're noticing the two of you are out of sync,
you probably are.
That's not all. According to body language expert Wood, a person who is about
to dump you will display a lack of open "windows" towards you. "Windows" being
his heart, eyes, neck and palms. If your man turns his heart (the center of his
chest) away from you as you are talking to each other, it's a big sign he's not
interested.
9. You see the writing on the wall.
According to graphologist Karen Weinberg, QDE, a person who is thinking of
ending a relationship will show clues in her handwriting. When writing the word
"love" she may begin to drop down the letter "e." Another sign to watch for is if
your partner diminishes the size of your name (sign of your importance to her.)
10. Every normal person should know which way the toilet paper goes...
If she's picking silly fights, or there's an unusual increase in emotional distance,
you've got bad news. According to Melvyn Frumkes, an attorney specializing in
divorce, "a person who picks nonsensical arguments is trying to get the other
person (you) to make the first move."
11. He keeps you waiting. And waiting. And waiting.
Time is an important non-verbal communicator," says Wood. If he keeps you
waiting, it's a sign his interest is waning, and a sign of disrespect.
This is true for dates as well. If he starts waiting until the very last minute to
make date plans with you, it's likely he's lost interest, or he's hoping something
better will come along and he's using you as a back-up.
12. She buys a personal pager, or a pre-paid cell phone.
This is bad news. Just about every private investigator in the book will tell you
the pager purchase is a sign of impending heartbreak. Sure, it could be for
work, but more likely, she's using it to get a head start on her post-you life.
Beep Beep - Bye Bye.
13. He used to be a three-blue-shirts-and-four-pair-of-Chinos kind of
guy, and suddenly he's obsessed with Armani.
According to Attorney Mel Frumkes, a person who is about to leave (or is
cheating) will take greater care with his appearance - updating his wardrobe,
losing weight, working out and even changing cologne. If your sweetie looks like
he just finished taping an episode of "A Makeover Story" - Those Chinos might
not be the only dud he's looking to lose.
Want to know when you're most likely to get the axe? Most experts agree it's
somewhere in the neighborhood of the first 3-5 months. So, stock up on tissues
and Ben & Jerry's if you're heading into the danger zone.
Only time (and his shoes) will tell.